Saturday, August 22, 2009

A Dream Come True

"You are not responsible for the How". -Beth Moore

Have you ever had one of those moments when you just knew God was speaking directly to you through a pastor or speaker? I had one of those moments just a few weeks ago during our bible study. Let me give you some background.

I've always wanted to have children, and praise God, after a long struggle, God made that dream come true. I always had another dream that went hand in hand with having children. I always wanted to be a full-time stay at home Mom once children came into the picture.

From the very beginning, before Elliana was ever conceived, Caleb and I had many discussions as to if we could afford living on his budget alone. A few years ago we sat down and put together a budget. At the time we discovered that these three things could not happen together: we could not own a home, I could not even work PART-TIME, and he could cot continue teaching at the school he loves. At the time I wasn't even pregnant. So, we prayed about it and decided we would revisit the budget later on.

Last spring (2008) we decided we were ready to buy a home. That was around the same time that I found out I was pregnant. We looked at the budget again and discovered that we could afford to buy a home and that Caleb could continue teaching where he wanted to. However, we still could not afford for me to be home full time. We were encouraged to see at this time that I could work part time though. I was a little disappointed but thankful that if I had to work it would only be part time.

So, we found a home within our budget and moved in last fall. Elliana was born in December and I was on maternity leave for 3 months. I loved those 3 months. Yes, Elliana was a very challenging infant. She cried all the time and almost never let me put her down. Still, I cherished every day I had with her and dreaded going back to work. I cried and cried the night before I returned to work in March.

The day to return came and went and I found myself getting used to the new routine of working part time. Everything was working out well until the first week of June came. My boss pulled me into her office and explained to me that my schedule of working Monday through Wednesday was not working for her or for the office anymore. I explained to her that I was not trying to be difficult, but I simply could not work Wednesday through Friday. It was a daycare issue for us and nobody was available to watch Elliana Wed through Friday. So, she offered for me to work in a new position. Again we prayed and decided it was our only choice since we still could not afford for me to be home full time.

I started the new position in July and soon discovered that I didn't care for it very much. Okay, actually I really did not like it at all. Somedays I was so stressed out. Still, I pressed on knowing this is what I needed to do to help make ends meet. All the time I was praying for God to rescue me. Either help me find another job or provide a way for me to be home full time. Some nights I would be up most of the night thinking about how this would all work out. I became more and more stressed because I wanted so badly to either find a new job, or find a way to work from home, or just get to be home full time.

Then, one saturday morning in our Esther bible study, Beth Moore said the words "you are not responsible for the how". She was explaining how God always has it worked out already and he works in ways that are unexpected. Of course she was referring to Esther's situation, but I felt like God was speaking directly to me and I felt a sense of relief come over me. I realized at that moment that I didn't need to stress about the situation. It was in God's hands and he's never failed me before. It would all work out one way or another.

Less than two weeks later Caleb called me at work and said "Christine, I have great news"! He went on to explain that his school had just gotten new health insurance and we could afford to put the whole family under his new insurance and save hundreds of dollars a month. (before we were going to have to spend about $600 a month for health insurance for the 3 of us)Finally! We could afford (almost) for me to be home full time! There is still a very small gap in our budget between what we need and what we have. However, the gap is growing smaller all the time. We have been saving for so many years that we are very comfortable using our savings accounts to get by for a long time (several years). I am confident that we will be fine and that God will provide one way or another. Who knows, in a matter of time, there may be no gap left at all.

I notified my boss this week that I will be quiting. The conversation went well and I told her I would stay as long as she needed me to (within reason of course). She asked me to stay 6 weeks and I agreed. My last week will be the last week of September. As excited as I am, leaving my job feels like leaving a major part of my life. I have been working at my job for 8 years. I was only 19 years old when I started working there. I was so young and single and living with room mates. I have literally grown up while working there. I will miss so many people but I am so excited to start this new chapter in my life. I still can't believe that God opened this door. Someone pinch me.

On a side note, here are some pictures of Elliana and her new favorite "toy", the laundry basket:

P.S. Ellie started saying "Mama" this week. I doubt that she knows that word is my name and relation to her, but I like to think that she does. :)



Courtney said...

Chris, this post made me smile so much. I am SO proud of you and so happy for you that you get to live out your dream. You are an amazing mother and it is good to see God bless you so much!

Stephanie Dean said...

Christine- Your post is so touching. The words you shared are encouraging to hear, and served as a gentle reminder that God will take care of all of the details.

Your story is so touching, and I am so happy that your dream is coming true. You and Caleb deserve it. I know God will continue to pour out His blessings on you and your little family!

Rebecca said...

Wow...God is so good to bless us with the desires of our hearts. I am always amazed at how God already knows the how and when and what and provides for us again and again when we step out in faith. What a wonderful time this will be for you. Enjoy the last few weeks of your job and many, many years of staying home with Elli and future kids.

Tara Brown said...

Yeah - we are so excited for you and praise God with you that He takes care of the details so very well!!!!

Dana Marie said...

CHRIS!!! I was so stoked to read this post! congratulation, I am so happy that you're able to stay home with Ellie! wahoooooooo!

Anonymous said...

chris I am so happy for you! You've wanted this for so long and now it's finally happening. I will miss spending some quality time with my niece though. Congrats!

CPT Mom said...

I am so excited for you guys! God is so good to take care of the how in our lives.

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for sharing what Beth Moore said, it's been popping in my head often.

I'm so happy that you are able to stay home with your daughter. What a blessing!


Anonymous said...

I am SOO happy for you that you get to stay home full time with Ellie!! =) What a blessing!! =) And to see how God has worked out the details, even when it seemed impossible!! Isn't it amazing how He works things out that we cannot even fathom!! =) Enjoy these years with her, honey, they go so fast! =)
Love, Mom

About Me

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I am a daughter of the King. Saved by grace. Follower of Christ. I love my God and I believe that he is faithful and true to his word! I'm still figuring out and trying to follow his plan for my life. I am a wife to my best friend Caleb, a mother to my miracle babies (they are my greatest joy and challenge), a sister and best friend to 3 passionate women, and a daughter to 2 amazing parents that continue to teach me what it is to be real and faithful to God and his word. I am lucky to get to be a stay at home Mom (thanks to God's provision). I love music, singing, coffee, cooking, baking, traveling, our beautiful state of Colorado, and mostly being with the family and friends that I love!

Husband, Caleb

Husband, Caleb
Caleb is an amazing husband and father. He is always so good to me. He is my best friend. He is the romantic one. We love to laugh and spend time together. We've been married for 7 years and I just love that I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

Our 1st Miracle

Our 1st Miracle
Elliana Faith... God blessed us with our first miracle little girl in December 2008. She is sweet, smart, spunky, funny, strong willed, precocious, extremely outgoing, vocal and so full of life! She brings us so much joy.

Our 2nd Miracle

Our 2nd Miracle
Ethan James,.. God blessed us with our little boy in March 2011. Ethan was a bit of a surprise and an even bigger miraclle. Ethan is ALL BOY! He is very active, into sports and running around. He is also sweet, introverted, affectionate, and laid back. These days he often has us laughing, he's starting to show a little bit of "clown" in him. He makes our hearts happy too. :)

Our 3rd Miracle

Our 3rd Miracle
Emsley Jeannette... Our surprise baby girl was born on June 11th, 2013 and came into the world 4 weeks early. Her first 2 weeks of life were spent in the NICU, but due to God's hands and the prayers of many people, she grew quickly and came home to join our family! She is an easy, sweet baby and we are enjoying getting to know her personality.


We fight one day and then the next day we're fine. We're always loud and crazy when we get together. We're very passionate. We've been through it all together, lots of ups and downs. We're eachother's biggest supporters.


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